is it "normal" to be messed up even 5 years after being raped?

Sometimes being raped causes Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome and can get overlooked when speaking to a professional and not disclosing that you have been raped. It is a very traumatic thing what with flashbacks and such. If you have not spoken with someone about it please do so, and if you have, voice your concerns about it still affecting your daily life. There must be some groups or solo therapy that you could join. Look up rape survivors or rape support on google.

Yes, it's normal. Of course rape can be very traumatic. I would recommend a book called Healing Where you Hurt on the Inside by Jon Eargle. It takes time but everything can be fixed.

Yes. I'm not going to sugar coat this for you, it can mess you up for your whole life so don't be afraid to ask for help of you want it.