Homosexuality and BDSM?

There is some overlap between the two groups, but I think it's more to do with acceptance and tolerance; the LGBT community is more likely to inspire people to be open about any kinky tendencies they may have, and BDSM events usually encourage people of all sexualities. Some people overgeneralise based on the stereotypes of both groups they've seen in the media.

My boyfriend has had similar experiences to you; he's quite open about being involved in the SM/Leather lifestyle, and I think people are sometimes surprised when he turns up with a woman!

I don't think the two are related. Being homosexual is widely accepted in the first world, and getting more so every day. Despite all the efforts of those on the political and religious right to claim its a choice, all of the evidence is that it is not a choice, and not changeable. Being into bondage, domination, and pain during sex is a set of sexual behaviors that crosses all preferential lines -- there are straight people, bi people and gay people who are into pain instead of pleasure. It is not rejected by most people as long as no one is hurt -- when it gets to the point where someone is being injured -- then it suddenly becomes unacceptable - and I agree with that. No one should be forced or harmed, in any sex act, regardless of the participants. Hermes PS I have to disagree with the person who says that more people are into BDSM than are gay. In the city where I live there are nearly a dozen major gay clubs and restaurants, a social club, gay businesses, and a community center. There are no BDSM venues at all. In NYC, where I did live for some years, there are far more gay venues than BDSM - and they are larger. Anecdotally, there are more gays than BDSM people in my opinion.

Most people don't even know what BDSM means.. very good question though, as I have always wondered about the relationship between being gay and being submissive. Purely based on my own personal observations, I find that the majority of gay men I encounter regardless of their physical appearance or dress, tend to be submissive. I know that being gay is probably of the result of cocktail of genetics and environment, but I can't help feeling that the environment element has something to do with a missing or ineffectual father figure during formative years... just an observation and off topic I know.. apologies.

You have to remember that most peoples' opinions of he stereotypical gay man come from the inferences from media. I think that a lot of people are more accepting of the "leather men" view, because it is the easiest for them to look at and say, "Wow, that's weird!" The implied connection between the BDSM community and homosexuals would, most likely, come from the "leather men" induced stereotype. If you really wanted to cure the opinionated ignorance of those sheep, that can see no more than the stereotype, start hanging out at lifestyle- friendly bars, find out where the impressions society has comes from and, once you have come to know the people (and the difference) introduce the sheep to your new friends (whether you ever play with them or not).

I haven't had anybody assume that I'm into that stuff because I'm gay. But, there have been a few times where people did think I would be. Just because I apparently look like I would be.

Talk about judging a book by its (apparently kinky looking) cover.

Actually yes. My friend is into BDSM like crazy. He likes the leather, bondage, whipping..etc. But he is very straight. I Think its a pretty common misconception.

whatever it is,i think we become what we become because we are so obsessed with ourselves.Past experiences of course could have a say in our predicament but all of that can change before it is too late.what you were,what you like or talk may not always portray the real you.You are what you are,not what others think.

Maybe it's just a stereotype that gay people like men because they like the "rough" part of sex.

I'm not interested in BSDM, but I like my sex to be wild.

Who says I don't fall under both banners? :P

But seriously, sometimes I forget my pal who's also into Bondage isn't anything but straight. I'm not making assumptions or anything, but it's really hard to remember sometimes....

I figure people just assume things because they aren't able to wrap their head around reality or they just don't care to educate themselves.

none so far, it depends on how bdsmish u look like, i think.... as for me, i wouldnt care less if someone tells me, why? because i kinda like the idea too hehe..:)