Untidy romms = bad mother?

This neatnick raised a slob. It drove me nuts for years. Finally, realizing it was just part of being a teen, I told her if she kept her door closed so I didn't have to see it I wouldn't say anything. Of course, rotting food was a health hazard so she did have to agree to this. One other thing. She was awful about piles of clothes. I never knew what was clean and what was dirty so I just started hanging all the clothes in the closet and let her worry about it. This was before the closed door agreement. After that if I suspected the clothes in the laundry room were clean and she'd been too lazy to put them up, I just put them in her clean pile. I figured slobs can't be too choosy. We never argued about this stuff again.

My kids' rooms were always a mess when they were teens. But working full-time and being a single mum, its hard to keep on top of housework, so their rooms were their responsibility. However, they did have a washing basket to put their dirty clothes in - and the rule was what wasn't in the basket wouldn't be washed. Some would say I was too laid-back with them, but they've both turned into responsible young adults. I would say leave them to it, life is too short for arguments, and there will come a time when you wish their old room wasn't so tidy all the time!

Because my mom always wants every single item to be in its place, and I can't stand it. When I go in her room, it feels like an abandoned attic, like no one lives there, and it scares me. I also find it pointless to clean my room because it'll just get messy again. My mom just tells me how filthy it is, and I don't care. If she wants to be a freak and cry every time there's a speck of dust, than she can, but I like my room messy because I have the comfort of knowing someone actually LIVES there. It may be my mom's house, but that is the one room that is mine. It's not like I can just move out, I'm a minor and she's my guardian. She's the one deciding to keep me.

you should just not care about it cause the more you try to argue with them the less likely they will clean it on their own. Instead let them have their room a mess eventually it will get too messy that your kids cant stand it them self. They will just clean everything up on their own will.

When my daughter became a teenager, she kept her room neater than I kept mine, which isn't saying much.

In general, though, I understand it is common for teens to neglect cleaning their rooms, but eventually they get over it.

Except for me. Well, I have improved some, and I never kept decaying food around.....

First and foremost- This is YOUR house. When the children pay the mortgage, they can live in filth. Set a standard, and make a big deal out of it- because it is.

Rotten food ??? Please.

My 3 teenagers would never even attempt it.

Good Luck!!!

I'm 18 and my room is always messy, i feel comfortable in it and my parents are always yelling at me to clean it up.

you are not a bad mother - your teen is just very lazy and relaxed.

he'll come by someday.

My rooms not the tidiest of all places. I can't stand a lot of mess but i can't stand it pristine. It just varies from person to person i guess.

It's like I always told my kids, "This is not your room. This is a room in MY house that I am kind enough to let you stay in. And you will keep that room in my house neat and tidy." And they did.

it is a child's responsibility to clean up after himself because if the parent does it all their life then they will never be able to take care of themselves