More to groan at - am having a bad time with ex hubby and access - am dreading tom morn - so neg ans pleeaase?

Did you hear about the snail who was beaten up by two tortoises? His friends were looking for revenge, so they wanted to know: “Did you get a good look at the tortoises who did this?”

“No” The snail answered. “It all happened soooo fast.”

When she returned from her trip to the USA, Ethel met up with friends to tell them about her holiday.

“When George saw the Grand Canyon, his face dropped a mile,” she said.

“Why? Was he disappointed?” asked Mary.

“No” said Ethel. “He fell over the edge.”

Suzanne was having an affair with a pest-control inspector.

One afternoon her husband returned home unexpectedly & found the man in the wardrobe.

“Who on earth are you?” the husband demanded.

“A pest-control inspector,” came the replay.

“What are you doing in there?”

“looking for moths.”

“And where are your clothes?”

The man looked down at himself and, “Those tricky little blighters!”

Ok they’re getting worse I know – but as another’s said on her – at least you could repeat them to you’re children!!!