after 10 years of separation I would like to get in contact with an ex friend of mine. How should I do this?

If he has started a new life, he may not be up for being contacted by an ex. If you knew someone in his new circle of friends or coworkers, i would put out a feeler to see if he would be willing to be in contact with you. You are cautions about sending the wrong signs, what are your motives? to close the loop on a relationship that ended badly or are you looking to restart a relationship? If it is the latter, and he is content in his new life as you described, then I would not recommend reaching out. You need to know what you want out of this meeting before you can decide whether to reach out or not.

You can never go back!!!!! Things will never be what they were and I have seen alot of people mess up by trying to go back to those oh so wonderful feelings! Life goes on and even if we don't like to admit it we are mostly looking for the old" person" that we were such as young and carefree like with a first love or maybe things are not that great in your love life now and you are just idolizing the time with him as if were grander than it really was. Good Luck I wouldn't contact him!

"somehow spiritual I feel there is something left between us"

you wouldn't be giving the wrong signs....you apparently still want something from him. he's moved on. do the same.

If he is married and has kids, I would leave him alone. You could try sending him an e-mail but if he does not respond, I would leave it alone. Even if he had no intentions of reconnecting with you, your contact with him could cause problems in his marriage and you dont want to be responsible for that.

there is really nothing to gain from this, as he is married and the husband of another with kids. don't do it unless u want to be disappointed, as the past is the past, and needs to stay there. u don't make a start with him, just remember him and what u once had, but don't interfere with his life now, as it will be u who is disappointed.

He is married and has children...and a LIFE. Leave him alone. Why is it that now you think you have a spirtual connection??? Any sign you give will be wrong. I'd leave it alone.

I would just keep it casual. Tell him you were thinking about him the other day and wondered how he was doing, then ask if he might be interested in meeting up for coffee and to catch up. Keep everything low-pressure ... you don't want to wreck his family if he's truly happyl

personally i think you should move on...it's been ten years and he has made no attempt to get in contact with you...so evidently he must be happy with where he's at...don't mean to sound harsh but sometimes things are better left as is....it's been ten years and i would think by now you'd be over your ex....

welll he is married and has a life...i wouldnt go there..you are opening pandora's box....the result of this may not be what you want....however if you precede...how about throwing him a casual email..like "i have been contacting some old friends and you popped into my head...want to see how you are...etc"

classmates.com and well just keep it friends, cause he has kids and all, and have a temp bf and meet up with him and his wife, and hang out a couple of times and see if anything happens and if it doesnt and drop him