PerFecT StrAngEr.. is back

John Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN ) for 6 a.m.

While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA ) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN PHILIPPINES ) .

He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA ), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE ) and tennis shoes (MADE IN

VIETNAM). After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA ), then he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO ) to see how much he could spend today.

After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN ) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA ), he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY ) filled it with GAS (from Saudi Arabia ) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.

At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day checking his computer (MADE IN MALAYSIA ), John decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL ) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE ) and turned on his TV (MADE IN KOREA ), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in AMERICA .

AND NOW HE'S HOPING HE CAN GET HELP FROM HIS PRESIDENT (MADE IN KENYA )

Two Guys were talking in the park when a bird splattered one of

them on the head. Eyeing the mess, the victim's companion offered to go get

some toilet paper.

"Won't do no good," said the messed-up one, "by the time you get back, that

bird will be four miles away."

how many dots do you see in this question......?

this place was so lively one... now its so dull..

@ smarties who r thinking of givin a stupid comment...

keep your smartaz comments to yourself and answer this..

The 1st is needed to make quotes

the 2nd bears the symbol of love

the 3rd is the biggest but found standing alone may offend those around

the 4th is used while making a choice or comes in handy if u have a gun

the 5th is the oddest and can be found wrestling at times

What are they???

What advice is shown below?

BEETROOT

YEETROOT

YOETROOT

YOUTROOT

YOURROOT

YOURSOOT

YOURSEOT

YOURSELT

YOURSELF

The following not only describes a famous monument, but is an anagram for its name. What is it?

BUILT TO STAY FREE

Salt: Good morning

Pepper: Hello

(this was slightly tougher than the "color" kiddie riddle..)

If...

White + Green = Light Green

White + Blue = Light Blue

White + Brown = Light Brown

Then ...

White + Black = ?

Welcome to the planet It, where collies eat beagles, beagles eat basset hounds, and basset hounds eat poodles.

It is....... <-???????

First off all.. can anyone explain to me how to decipher cryptograms.. (mail and tell me).. thanks

Now for a riddle:-

Find out what the animals are! (for example, "To run away or escape" could be a "flea">> flee)

1.hair-control foam

2. very exposed

3. tellin' falsities

4. a lamenting cry

5. a dull person

6. a precious or loved one

7. first you get a parking ticket, then you get this

8. these make up a chain

Can you tell me what is common in all the words below?

1. Rite

2. Oven

3. Hole

4. Ring

5. Itch

I always drift with the current

Down these long canals they have made

Tame.. yet wild.. I run elusive

Multitasking to your aid.

Before I came, the world was darker

Colder.. sometimes.. rougher, true

But though I might make living easy,

I am good at killing people too.

What am i?

Can you guess what i am talking about about in the verse below?

Scary droplets from the sky

Tumble down as night goes by

Over the lands it carries on

Rainfall pours, sun is gone

Merging roars and bright light

Yearning for a peaceful night

Three boys received their grades from their female sex education instructor. One got a D+, the second a D- and the third an F.

"One day we should get her for this," said the first boy. "

I agree. We'll grab her..." said the second.

"Yeah," said the third. "And then we'll kick her in the nuts!"

10 "I noticed you thrashing around. Would you like to hold onto my floaties?"

9 "You do know how to inflate your raft, don't you? Just put your lips together and blow."

8 "I'm worried about you getting a sunburn. How about I cover you with my body?"

7 "Don't save me! Let me go down three times."

6 "Wanna go back to my place and do something about that shrinkage?"

5 "Come on, I'm a wealthy neglected housewife, you're a pool boy. It's practically required by law that you do me."

4 "Sorry, babe, did I make you all wet?"

3 "Now how'd you manage to fit that great big thing into that little ol' Speedo?"

2 "Wanna join the 9-foot-deep- end-of-the- pool club?"

and the Number 1 Swimming Pool Pickup Line...

1 "If everybody here accidentally drowned, the first bloated corpse I'd pull out would be yours, sweetheart."

A 6 year old was explaining to the other kids what "extinct" meant.

"Well," she said, in all seriousness, "It means that the dinosaurs are all dead and have been dead so long they don't stink anymore, and that's why they call them 'exstinkt'."

Amy's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement -- not even her parents' nasty divorce.

A few days before the wedding, Amy's mother showed her the new dress she had bought for the wedding. It was the PERFECT dress to wear and she was sure to be the best-dressed mother of the bride ever!

The next day, however, Amy was horrified to learn that her father's new young wife had bought the exact same dress! Amy went to her and asked her to exchange it, but she refused.

"Absolutely not. I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.

Amy told her mother who graciously said, "Never mind sweetheart, I'll just get another dress. After all, it's your special day."

A few days later, they went shopping and she found another dress. When they stopped for lunch, Amy asked her mother, "Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it."

Amy's mom just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner!"

A young woman was preparing for her wedding. She asked her mother to go out and buy a nice long black negligee and carefully place it in her suitcase so it would not wrinkle.

Mom forgot until the last minute, so she dashed out and could only find a short pink nighty. She bought it and threw it into the suitcase.

After the wedding, the bride and groom enter their hotel room. The groom was a little self-conscious, so he asked his new bride to change in the bathroom and promise not to peek while he got ready for bed.

While she was in the bathroom, she opened her suitcase and saw the negligee her mother had thrown in there. She exclaimed, "Oh no, it's short, pink and wrinkled!"

Then her groom cried out, "I told you not to peek!"

In this teaser, you have to find the odd ones out in the groups of words. BUT WAIT! There's a catch. Each group of words has TWO words which do not belong. Can you find them both?

EXAMPLE:

Lily - Jane - Tulip - Rose

Jane does not belong as it's the only one which is not a flower

Tulip also does not belong because it's the only one which is not a girl's name

You're on you own for the rest... !!!!!!!!!!

1. Dodge - Ford - Lincoln - Hoover

2. King - Earl - Knight - Bishop

3. Yellow - Green - Dead - Black

(for example, "To run away or escape" could be a "flea") {flee}

1. hair-control foam

2. very exposed

3. tellin' falsities

4. a lamenting cry

5. a dull person

6. a precious or loved one

7. first you get a parking ticket, then you get this

8. these make up a chain