?

She will call. Talk for a few minutes and then she always tells me she has to run. That holds true even when I call. Sometimes I find that rude.

I wasnt exactly annoyed when I saw my facebook populated by her 3 day lonng festivities at a resort with her family and friends. I did feel bad, but kind of understand you can invite the entire world, and am definitely not on her A List ( which was true many years back). We have been in touch though and stayed BFFs.

I wished her, end of story.After returning from the celebrations she now wants to meet me at a short notice. Like tomorrow ( am actually busy). And somehow this hurts. Cannot pinpoint why. Neither can I make out why this invite ( she says she wants to spend time with her besties whom she has travelled through life. Whats with her now ?

I wasnt exactly annoyed when I saw my facebook popullated by her 3 day lonng festivities at a resort with her family and friends. I did feel bad, but kind of understand you can invite the entie world, and am definitely not on her A List ( which was true many years back). We have been in touch though and stayed BFFs.

I wished her, end of story.After returning from the celebrations she now wants to meet me at a short notice. Like tomorrow ( am actually busy). And somehow this hurts. Cannot pinpoint why. Neither can I make out why this invite ( she says she wants to spend time with her besties whom she has travelled through life. Whats with her now ?

As and when we meet, the opening words will be like:

"You are looking really pale today".

"Whats wrong with your hair ?"

"Your outfit is a bit out of whack".

"You got dark under eye circles?"

etc etc ? I find it totally unneccessary and bugging, but am just trying to figure out whats behind this ?

Okay, so a Coach/Trainer asked if he could use my premises for a daylong workshop he was conducting. He further added on, that I could attend it too. No money was discussed at all. And during the conversations there was no talk about any fee that I would need to remit. 

Initially I had said the food etc is all on me as it is a small group of 10 persons. Also, I was told that his team would carry coke, crackers and confectioneries, while I had to do the coffe breaks, and lunch.

Closer to the date, I was reminded firstly about getting the crackers, coke and confectioneries. Then I get a second call mentioning that I need to cater for a breakfast too. All good. I did not have a problem with that either. 

Now at the nth hour I get another call asking me to remit the payment. We have been talking through the entire week and there was no mention at all. Now that the fliers have gone out, saying that am hosting it and people have registered for it, I am told I need to pay up.

I am a bit confused as to what is the right thing to do. I feel a bit short changed, nevertheless would want some mature advice on this. Should I bill the trainer for using my premises, my staff and food and beverage service ?

thanks

It is the gifting season, and there is so much stress on gifting things to one another. I have noticed that a lot of gifts are rewrapped and forwarded to me. I am sure it happens all the time. 

I feel these are really dishonest gifts and I am better off without them. I received items that are past an expiry date, or passed on ( and they are frayed), and either discounted items, which fall apart at the first instance. 

I am really at a loss to tackle these kind of gifts.

A year back a relative of mine borrowed money from me, but never bothered to return it at all. I did not ask back either, as I was aware of their financial condition.

Now their daughter is getting married and the family has pulled out all stop for the wedding in terms of the obscene amount being spent. 

So I asked them to return my money. My mum is very put off about my asking the money back. 

What do you think ?

My almost 80 year old mum got invited to a farewell lunch party at the other end of town at barely 24 hours notice. I had a busy weekend so no time to plan at all. Plus, cannot ignore Covid 19 either. So I refused to take her to the party which was a 2 hour drive from my home.

Usually I drive her to all such occassions as it gives her an opportuity to meet friends and old time colleagues and relive her old memories. But this time I have flatly refused. Now she is throwing a tantrum !

I feel guilty and stressed. Am I right to have refused to take her ? 

My almost 80 year old mum got invited to a farewell lunch party at the other end of town at barely 24 hours notice. I had a busy weekend so no time to plan at all. Plus, cannot ignore Covid 19 either. So I refused to take her to the party which was a 2 hour drive from my home.

Usually I drive her to all such occassions as it gives her an opportuity to meet friends and old time colleagues and relive her old memories. But this time I have flatly refused. Now she is throwing a tantrum !

I feel guilty and stressed. Am I right to have refused to take her ? 

I was invited by my sister for her anniversary. During a at idiscussion the neice began hollering at me about my ignorance over some data. I kept repeating that she could check on the internet, it is all there. Anyways, it ended with her telling me that she never wants me to come to their place ( she lives with them). I was quite stunned and I left for my home. 

I am now really wondering whay I could have done right. Well....this isnt the first time. She has shouted at me earlier as well on several occasions.

My new boss, has us all on a WhatsApp group. She is quite through the day and then shoots of messages past midnight, and that too stressful ones, asking us for updates.

I have a client, where I work as a contractor. The company is owned by 3 persons of the same family. I got an invite from one of the owners, insisting that I attend the wedding. While I subtly mentioned that I am happy but wont be able to travel out of town for the wedding.

The client insisted on booking a place for me as well. Out of the blue I receive an email from the company travel desk about the cancellation of the reservation made.

I find it awkward and embarrassing. How do I handle this ?

Should I cease my professional relationship as well ?

I feel that they have underestimated the value of time that I was taking out for the travel, the cost of travel and the trouble of gifting something worthwhile.

Update: ON insistence I relented and decided to travel for the wedding function.

I have a client, where I work as a contractor. The company is owned by 3 persons of the same family. I got an invite from one of the owners, insisting that I attend the wedding. While I subtly mentioned that I am happy but wont be able to travel out of town for the wedding.

The client insisted on booking a place for me as well. Out of the blue I receive an email from the company travel desk about the cancellation of the reservation made.

I find it awkward and embarrassing. How do I handle this ?

Should I cease my professional relationship as well ?

I feel that they have underestimated the value of time that I was taking out for the travel, the cost of travel and the trouble of gifting something worthwhile.

So I was away for a fortnight and a neighbour messaged me that the lights were on in the night in my house.

When I checked back home, I learnt that a guest of my brother had parked himself there for 3-4 days.

I am back and there is no mention about it.

Honestly, I am feeling a little territorial and don't think I would allow anyone to use my space without informing me. Especially when I know that it will not be reciprocated, should I mistakenly take similar liberties.

Should I confront or let it pass ?

I have loved my uncle dearly. He wasn't well off, ever, but that never came between us. It was unconditional love...all the way.

Things got complicated as my mother who is his ( my uncle's older sister) fell out. My mom said many mean things to him and his family to spite him. I have had not role to play.

When I called him up the other day, he let me know that I was just a sugar coated version and basically the cause of his bad luck in life, and how he had thrown away life's great opportunities because of my family.

Hard to say, if I should apologize on my mom's behalf. Which actually I did. He knows very well, how I moved out of mom's house due to her spiteful nature.

He just ripped me apart, that takes away all the happy memories I ever had of childhood. What do I do ?

I am stuck. My uncle who is a few years older has always been family to me. Any occasion it is understood that he has to be a part of it. We have shared a very close/ thick bond.

His daughter is getting engaged ( in this part of the world it is arranged by the parents), I was informed that it is next week, but only my mum needs to attend it. This went on for 3 days, and over all phone conversations my mum, siblings and I were repeatedly told how only my mum was required for the family event.

It really felt bad. Fast forward, 4 days since the first call from my uncle, he is now literally begging me and my siblings to make it to the ceremony. Mum is throwing tantrums about how selfish I am by turning down the invite.

I am being asked to be magnanimous and 'be there'. I am confused...please help

Here is my uncle, who all his life was in dire straits, and my parents spent their entire lifetime's savings to get him on his feet. It did not stop there, us 3 siblings went out of our way to help my uncle's children with education, jobs and basic expenses.

We loved them unconditionally, and sure enough they have been a part of all our milestones in life. Now baby cousin sister is getting engaged and we have been clearly hinted at that we are not a part of the ceremony. Usually, in this part of the world and engagement is a very important affair and being 'this' close does set the expectation that we should have been a part of the ceremony.

I am still trying to figure out why we were cut out. Just last week we had them over for my mum's 75th ( all fare/ cab/ stay paid by me !!!

I am a bit shocked and feeling bad, why is that ?

So we are a bunch of buddies, Around 7 families and once in a while we party together. So I sent out an invite on the whatsapp group. 2 of them promptly gave me the heads up.

I noticed that everyone was reading the messages but not responding at all. 2 people declined due to their prior commitments, and yet again I do not hear from the other 3 at all.

Taking a cue, I suggested cancelling/ postponing. Much later in the day remaining 3 confirmed, once I had regretted to the first 2.

I am wondering if it was bad manners not to honor those that had accepted the invite spontaneously. ?

Now I have offered another date the very next day. One of the persons who had declined is still bent on sabotaging the new date as well.

What is the correct thing to do ?

I got a call from someone with a familiar sounding name and they want my professional services. A meeting has been set up with them for tomorrow. 20 years back I had asked a similar naming persons family to vacate my premises as they over stayed. It was a goodwill gesture on my part as they were somewhat in need. Turns out that a week became a month and I lost it.

I am wondering what do I do if it turns out to be the same person.