Stefan

I know this question must have been asked a million times already, but I just feel like getting this off my chest and hear other ppl's views about this.

First off, some info about myself. I'm 23 years old, have been in several relationships, none of which was successful. And that's the question. I have tried literally everything. Literally. Men, Women, hell, even Transgender. Yet, nothing seems to give me the so often praised "happiness" that everyone is talking about. Also, I was kind of late to have lost my virginity at about 19 years of age I think. To be honest, I don't see what people see in Sex. Maybe I might be insecure or something, but who gives a damn. I sort of used to want it, then I had it and when i really think about it, it just feels to me like a chore to be performed with certain perfection, which I sure as hell can not do (which is funny since i live in goddamn Porn country (Germany)). I know some idiots are going to give me **** about what a wimp I may be, but hey, what ever floats your boat.

So basically, to me a relationship is just nothing but stress and an incredible burden to cast upon myself, also I find that it makes me incredibly vulnerable, and I always got burned when I gave relationships a try, being emotionally devastastated in the end, which is the reason why I stopped trying because I just can't go through this once more. You know, the whole process of getting to know smbd, warming up to them, opening yourself up, just to be dumped within about 2 months, lol, so nobody seems to get along with me long enough to stay for longer than about 2 months. I wonder why that is ? Everybody seems to enjoy it soooo much. Also, for me keeping up friendships sometimes seems like such a chore... In the end, I ask myself if I might be missing out on smth by just doing something wrong? Or am I just damaged goods O.o? I would not say that I am bad looking or anything, but nobody looks at me twice, only on very very very rare occasions, and most of the time, I don't want nothing to do with those ppl.

So tell me, what's your view on the subject? And please please don't tell me how there are so many people out there to pick from. Seriously, I won't try and most likely I would end up rejecting anyone who tries anything with me, mainly because I don't want to get burned again.

Also, I don't really miss it most of the time, and if I do, I just think of how I hated it in the past and I think of the endless sorrow it has brought me back then. ;)

So I bet theres going to be a lot of TLDRs but I don't blame you. If you want to provide input, fell free to do so.