?

i am a straight guy and have no sexual interest in other guys now or ever.

if i become a girl (or at least Live as a girl) and still remain attracted to girls, does that make me a homosexual?

how should i go about splicing in a power indicator led to a usb device such as a joystick or mouse... i would like to use the power that is already in the (corded) usb devices circuit.....,

but if it is better give the indicator led it's own power source,then i would'nt mind adding a small battery. preferably would rather splice it to the usb power on the "front end", or,,,, use the data channels? anyway, thanks for your consideration or input. :)

please please please help me i have been searching for this answer all week, i have wasted countless hours searching electronic sites and forums and manufacturers for this answer.

all i need is to be able to identify an OA91 germanium diode. i understand they may come in a variety of casing types or with different markings per manufacturer but absolutely none of the information or even the pictures that i have found so far have been pertinant to my question.

i need a description of the color bands or other markings i should be looking for.... i have no money whatsoever but i have disassembled many electronics and am searching through the pieces. i have taken apart some rather old casio and yamaha (cheap) keyboards, which from what i understand, should be an excellent source of these type of germanium diodes. ultimately, i am constructing a Feild Strength Meter and this is the only part that i am lacking. my time for this project is running out and i am desperate for any help. please and thank you.

you've read questions from guys asking "why don't girls like nice guys?" and "do girls only like bad boys?" ......my answer to this, was to eliminate the question, completely.

see, i am a really nice guy, and good looking. (haha no really i am) but i have been single (avoided by girls) for just over seven years now. seven straight years of lonelyness has braought much greif and depression into my life, having no outlet for compassion and no companionship for positive reinforcement (or even negative experience) is just dehumanizing. so..... this past January, i finally took controll over the matters of my mind, and said, "No More Sadness. No More Loneliness.

No More Despair. and certainly...........No more wasting precious time out of my life waiting on and trying for Companionship (or Love). i am now happy to say that i am happy :) as a (straight) individual. i am happy alone. happy when not alone. i don't care for the relations and i dont even want the sex. am i Bitter? no. did i give up? No. (main question here) Am i just awesome or what? :) :)

why do i feel like such a pig when i scrape Chinese to-go food out of a paper box into my mouth, using sticks? or even a fork? or when drinking from a bowl?

so long as i'm not attacking a particular individual, i can openly speak out in hatred against all womankind, right? i mean that's my legal right as an American Citizen correct?

it's not like every woman on earth is going to get together and sue me eh?

i really am insane, no explanation required as i am sure you can imagine what insanity is like.

although i am constantly plagued by reckless and violent or destructive thoughts, i manage not to act upon them unless i am the only person getting hurt, in which case i just don't care.

i hear voices and other sounds almost constantly and i have learned over time just to ignore them because i know they are not real. when i am alone i do lots and lots of dumb stuff.... sometimes i will make a noise and repeat it for about 10 minutes solid... or maybe jump up and down in one spot for just as long. sometimes my imagination takes over and i will just stand somewhere staring at the wall...when really i am tripping out in my mind.

(at this point) do i sound like the type of person who should be locked away from society?

furthermore, i should be on medication but i can no longer afford it so i don't take it, i love doing drugs, i have only a couple of freinds, i have no social life, no love life, and i suffer clinical depression and have many anxiety and anger management issues.

i am non-hyper ADHD diagnosed, borderline psychotic, and i suspect maybe bipolar too.

i have advanced knowledge of combat tactics and weapons, i own many guns and lots of ammo,

i have certain chemistry skills and i am able to survive in almost any climate with little or no provisions as i have studied the ways of ancient hunter and gatherer societies.

plus i dont give a **** wether i live or die,

but now... i'm loosing touch with reality and i really am going insane,

so i ask once again... should i be locked up away from society ?

ps..... it's probably not enough to go on, but nobody is ever going to get to know me anyway,

i am very secritive in person, and if you met me, you would never figure me out because

i am able to hide all of this under the surface.

all these girls keep ignoring me and going back to the same jerks who abuse them, i personally know an abusive guy who sleeps with about 7 different girls constantly, 2 of them are married and 3 of them are just in a realtionship with somebody else.

of course i do NOT beleive in infidelity, but i wonder why these girls would leave their husbans and boyfreinds twice a week to go get slapped around and cussed at by some delinquent guy who has no respect.

what does this teach the rest of us? because i am lonely as hell and havent been on a date in years and seem unable to meet girls because apparently thier optical nerves dont pickup lightwaves on a "nice guy" frequency or some ****.

should i really just go outside and slap the first girl i feel attracted to? is that how it works these days? really?

what should i do if we go steady and have a one month anniversary? stab her? call her a **** and piss in her face perhaps?

what if i want to marry her? should i rape her parents and set her children on fire?

of course.... i will never get the chance to because i will never meet another girl in my entire life and do you know why?

A......because i'm nice.....and i'm NOT giving that up. :P

B......because only abusive people get love and attention..

just to satisfy my tortured and shattered concept of relations,

i would ABSOLUTELY ADORE it if a female were to openly reply to this

and JUST ADMIT IT out loud for once......

that nice guys are invisible and abusive guys are your God.

i have horrendous dreams that feel like weeks of torture and mad confusion, they impress upon my mind so hard that i am often unable to discern between dream and reality for up to 3 hours after i wake up. in many cases i have dreamed that a deceased freind or relative is actually alive and well, then after i wake up and start to go to thier house for a visit....the reality of thier being dead slowly sinks in.

(which is a very unpleasnt experience to have, twice or even three times a week) in other cases i would think that somebody has died and after i wake up i am quite shocked to see this person alive.

even though, this is not the sole content of my constant bad dreams....it is probably the finest example i can give of how these dreams are screwing with my waking life on a daily basis. i'm somewhat afraid that i will lose track of what reality is one day.

the REAL question is.... how do i stop it? how do i avoid dreaming?

(because i am dirt poor and cannot afford professional help)