Dr. Srsly

I've risen from the Y!A grave only to bring you a less than witty question...I apologize in advance.

I've rekindled a relationship with an ex-girlfriend a few months ago. We parted because she had been dishonest about some things in her life that I couldn't look over at the time. After being away from each other for a few months we entered back into each others' lives as friends and about a year after that this past December, we decided to give "us" another try even though we're currently in different states....she in Minnesota and I still in NJ.

Because of other relationships and the fact we had once not spoken for months, I have abandonment issues when it comes to my girlfriend. If we get into a fight on the phone and she wants to hang up and chill for awhile, I physically can't let her do it. I break down into a sobbing mess and lose the ability to breath. If she doesn't respond to my text messages, I always assume the worst.

Now this is a huge issue as she's an MD/PhD student and she has a lot of work to take care of for classes, lab, etc. I've never asked her to put aside her coursework for my sake, in face I've always encouraged her to take time to get her work done, but she always seems to downplay the amount of work she has to get done up until the last minute and then panic and completely ignore me rather than space herself out so we can balance out our work and free time. I come to the conclusion that I've done something wrong and so she's trying to get away from me, and the urge to blow up her phone with calls and texts can become overwhelming.

Today she has an important review that she needs to finish writing for a medical journal. Because of this she hasn't answered my text (I only sent two all day, I don't think that's too bad) and she said she wanted to sleep in this morning rather than talk to me as we usually do every morning before I go to work. I think I would be okay normally if we didn't just have a huge fight on my birthday the night before last, and then another fight last night, both over stupid misunderstandings.

I'm sure she's just working on her paper, but I'm really fighting the urge to text her again or duck into the breakroom and give her a call. Can someone just tell me I'm being stupid and that I should leave her alone and everything will be fine later on?

I should probably add that with the exception of the one bridesmaid and the matron, any attempt at helping with the plans from anyone else has been taken over by one or the other. I sincerely don't believe they realize everyone else has been pushed out, but I suppose I don't want to risk hurt feelings amongst peopel who have to work together for this wedding.

I have this little quirk...well, personality flaw, perhaps...whatever it is, it's becoming more and more of a burden in my life.

I have this constant paranoia that I'm going to make someone upset with me at work. Whether it be a customer (I work in a bank), one of my bosses, or a co-worker, I'm paranoid that someone will come after me about something if anything does not go smoothly. The situation doesn't even have to have anything to do with me, or I could have followed the rules precisely, and I'm still afraid to the point of making myself physically sick.

For example, today I had a customer who wanted me to bend (to the point of breaking) a rule for her, simply because another employee at another branch has done the same for her in the past. When I told her I couldn't do the same, she became upset and left to go to that other branch...not before taking note of my name, of course. So now, I feel sick to my stomach, waiting for someone from that other branch to call and complain. My rational mind knows that they won't, and that I did the right thing, but I still feel so anxious.

Is this simple work-related stress or is there possibly something wrong with me?

I work in a very small bank. There are only 4 employees here, so we all work very closely all the time. There are 2 customer service workers (including myself) and 2 tellers. The two tellers are constantly bad-mouthing each other behind each others backs, and trying to drag me into the middle of their disputes. I don't think either one of them are exemplary employees, but I take a "live and let live" stance on the whole thing. It makes me very uncomfortable as when I do actually say anything, I'm afraid it will be used to back up arguments that I don't condone in any way, and that it might tie me into any issues their catty behavior causes.

I'm getting really tired of being put in the middle of their problems. As I'm typing right now, one of them is rambling on in my ear, to spite the fact that I'm obviously not listening and am not going to respond. What each of them wants is for me to go to the manager with their complaints, but it's just not going to happen.

Since ignoring them to try and stay out of it obviously isn't working in my favor, does anyone have any other suggestions as to what I can do about this situation? It's creating a hostile work environment, and it's really just getting annoying.

I've been trying to add some new fonts to use in photoshop. I know you have to add them to the fonts folder via control panel, but when I try to add the fonts to the folder, the new file doesn't show up! I've tried both dragging the file into the Fonts folder from the folder I have it downloaded to and copying and pasting it to the Fonts folder, It didn't work either way.

Am I missing something, here?

FYI -I'm the only user on this computer so I'm the administrator.

Do you have a song that makes you cry, even if it isn't particularly sad, or at least isn't meant to be?

For me it's "If I Ever Leave this World Alive" by Flogging Molly

It was recently used in the soundtrack for P.S.-I Love You but it was actually released a few years ago on an earlier album of their's that I have. It always makes me misty-eyed, even though the tune itself is set to a rather upbeat melody and it's not meant to be particularly sad.

What is something you see occur frequently on Y!A that just makes you want to scream or shake your monitor?

I have three Y!A pet peeves:

1. The constant array of Twilight related questions.

2. Askers who attempt to disguise homework questions as questions of general topic interest. Do your own work!

3. The "Am I pregnant?" question... No one here (even if you are a doctor!) can answer that via internet forum without just guessing or making assumptions. Go to the pharmacy and get a test, please.

How about you?

I would like to purchase a pen tablet. I've never owned one before, and I'm not a professional artists by any means, but I do cartoon and have sometimes taken commissions online via my "deviant art" account. I believe being able to draw right into photoshop, rather than scanning it first, would greatly improve the quality of my work, but I really can't afford to spend $300+ on a pen tablet.

Do you know of a pen tablet that is more affordable, but is still effective and won't be a waste of money?

All help is appreciated!

I have a very good (or at least I thought he was) friend who sometimes has a habit of completely ignoring me, but will then come back to me all smiles a few days later and act like he hadn't blatantly ignored every contact I tried to make with him for days. He has a pretty serious illness (aplastic anemia - see wikipedia.com) and so can become a bit down at times, so I try to give him a lot of leeway when it comes to things like this, but it only makes me worry more about him. I also can't completely ignore the fact that it really hurts my feelings. One of the reasons we get along to well is because we're normally just two silly, happy-go-lucky people who like to goof around so I dread ever having to bring something serious up like this. Also, I don't want to come across as selfish..."Hey buddy, you may be sick, but I want my messages answered!" It may not bother me as much if I didn't know for a fact he has no problem contacting other people while ignoring me...Any thoughts? Suggestions?